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anddiamssemicolon ([personal profile] anddiamssemicolon) wrote in [community profile] ffawiki_backup2016-08-15 05:53 pm
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Gunga Jay

On Sep. 5, 2015, inspired by Jaythenerdkid, a nonny wrote this Kipling parody:

 

Gunga Jay

 

You can talk o’ Mother Jones,

Worship Herbert Block’s bleached bones,

But they’re rankest of beginners, ha’n’t you heard?

For when all is down ‘n’ out

Who should give a mighty shout

But the fearless, gallant voice of jaythenerd!

 

It was Jay Jay Jay!

She swooped right in to swiftly save the day!

She went sloggin’ thru the slime

And came dashin’ double-time

For to worship at those brilliant feet of clay!

 

She never paused to think

That she might be at the brink

Of a Venus flytrap, pitcher plant, or such.

“What’s diverse is never wrong,

So I’ll join the buzzy song

’Cause you can't believe a POC too much!”

 

It was Jay Jay Jay!

She grabbed her pen and jumped into the fray!

When a friendly soul comes bargin’

From a life lived in the margin

Only Jay can force the puppies to make way!

 

No award can fool her eyes,

And no whitewashed pack of lies

Can persuade her that she’s talking to a mask.

Those who claimed they were harassed

Are all running ‘round bare-assed:

That’s the answer that she got for just an ask!

 

Oh you Jay Jay Jay!

You’ve come to save the world from F_FA!

One of two things must be true:

There’s a Bee blackmailing you,

Or you’re happy in a certain wordsmith’s pay.